Hey there. Just a friendly warning, if you’re here for the recipe you may want to scroll down; the following may not be of interest to many of you, and that’s fine, but it’s something I felt I needed to write.
I had a post all written and ready about how my friend had this great sherry-tasting party last month, with all of this amazing Spanish food, lively conversation, etc. but I had this nagging feeling and it just didn’t feel right to post it. Although the party was beyond lovely and I had a great time, the evening was marred by the fact that I completely and totally flaked out on a good friend. I was supposed to text her the address of the party, and even after having said out loud to my brother as we were walking in the building that I needed to do just that, a few seconds later I was distracted by a conversation and the thought left my mind. I then proceeded to leave my phone in my coat pocket in the bedroom all night, so I didn’t hear any of my friend’s calls or texts. To make matters worse, she had already driven over 20 miles and was in a bar nearby awaiting contact from me.
Of course, as soon as we walked out of the building to leave the party, it triggered the memory that I was supposed to have contacted her, but by then it was too late. I called and offered frantic apologies, but the damage was done. Of course she felt, as I would have, that it was simply unimportant to me and that my other friends had taken precedence. I was so frustrated- how to explain that that was not the case; that I just hadn’t “pictured” her at the party (she decided to go at the last minute) so it didn’t seem “off” that she wasn’t there? Although it was the truth, it sounded like a lame excuse even to me.
I’ve been doing some research lately to try to understand why my mind works the way it does and why I’m often frustrated by my forgetfulness, inability to be organized or to accomplish certain tasks. I came across the following and it was like reading a summary of my life story: frequently losing things, trouble completing routine or mundane tasks, academic underachiever, short temper, low stress threshold and several other characteristics that were uncomfortably familiar.
These are some of the manifestations of a certain type of ADD. Now, I haven’t been officially diagnosed, but based on a laundry list of symptoms which I won’t bore you with here, it’s exceedingly probable that this is the explanation to years and years of figuratively banging my head against a wall wondering why I couldn’t seem to be motivated to accomplish as much as my peers of similar intelligence and education, why my house is frequently a mess, and why I feel disproportionately stressed out by life’s day-to-day tasks. Apparently it’s common for the condition to go undiagnosed in high-functioning girls/women, because they often don’t exhibit the hyperactivity and disruptive behavior that boys do. Because the hyperactive form of ADHD is so much more prevalent in the general discourse, I never knew that there were different types and it never occurred to me that it could be an explanation.
I couldn’t help but get emotional reading the list of symptoms and feeling this overwhelming sense of recognition, after literally decades of feeling that something was “wrong” with me but not knowing what (Am I just lazy? Why is it so hard for me to be organized? etc). Even my blog posts, which I enjoy, often take me two to three weeks after the fact before I am able to post them, and those of you who are regular readers have probably noticed that I often sound harried or overwhelmed even though I don’t have any kids and have a lifestyle with (relatively) few responsibilities.
Lest this post be a total drag, I did want to share with you this most excellent recipe for Spanish-style deviled eggs that I took to the sherry party. Just about everyone likes deviled eggs, and a couple people at the party said these were the best they’d ever had. They come from a colorful and well-put-together cookbook called The New Spanish Table, and although they’re no more difficult to make than any other deviled eggs, they pack a lot more flavor thanks to the inclusion of tuna and some other goodies.
2011 is going to be a huge year for me with the new house and the wedding, so I’m hoping that getting better informed about this condition will allow me to better manage these seemingly monumental events and enjoy them rather than feel freaked out and stressed. Wish me luck. As for you, I wish you all the best of holidays, and a healthy and happy New Year!
6 hard-boiled eggs, peeled and halved lengthwise (I recommend making one or two extra in case you have a couple that don’t peel cleanly)
1 6-oz can tuna in olive oil, tuna drained and flaked
2 Tbs capers, rinsed and drained
1 Tbs lemon juice
1 small or half a large shallot, minced (about 1 heaping Tbs)
2 Tbs mayonnaise
salt and freshly ground pepper to taste
piquillo or roasted pepper, cut into thin strips for garnish
handful of chopped parsley
Mash the yolks well in a bowl. Stir in the mayonnaise, lemon juice, shallot and capers until well incorporated. I like to mix the tuna in at the very end so it retains a bit more of its texture. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Mound as much of the filling as possible into the halved egg whites (you may have a bit left over). Garnish each egg with strips of pepper, and scatter the plate with the chopped parsley.
Once again I am doing my Daring Kitchen post at the last possible second… I was planning to make the sushi last weekend but got busy, blah blah. I’ve made sushi at home before, so I guess I thought it would be no big deal to go to the store at noon-ish and have the sushi made in time to be able to take daytime photos and post by this evening. Long story short, all the sushi got made, but it took over 3 hours and I didn’t even get to photograph the dragon roll. It’s just as well- I was rushing so much that it didn’t look like much of anything worth photographing. It tasted great though- I modified a favorite roll from our usual sushi joint, Noble Fish (a restaurant/Japanese grocery, where I got the supplies for the sushi).
Sushi chefs have been doing California rolls since the ’80s; the chefs at Noble went even further south to Mexico for inspiration. The Acapulco roll is one we frequently order- an inside-out roll with tuna, avocado, jalapeno, and rolled in cilantro leaves. Noble Fish uses pickled jalapenos, but I opted for fresh, and added a little cucumber since I had some left over. I made the first Acapulco roll with the cilantro inside and the avocado on the outside (that was supposed to be my Dragon roll), but wasn’t that thrilled with how it turned out so I made the rest as “normal” sushi rolls.
In addition to the Acapulco roll, I made a spicy California roll (pictured above- avocado, carrot, cucumber, and shrimp with sriracha mayo) and some salmon and eel nigiri. I lucked out and found a whole barbecued eel (unagi) in the freezer section- I think they cook it and vacuum-seal it right there at the store. They even gave me a couple extra packets of eel sauce to go with it. The eel was a bit pricey but when you compare it to buying nigiri in the restaurant it’s still much cheaper (same for the raw salmon & tuna I bought). I wish they sold live eels- that would REALLY be a daring challenge to barbecue an eel! (I actually have had grilled eel before, in Sardinia, and it was delicious, but it was a bit odd watching them writhe around in the bag on the way home from the store!)
If I ever get a bug to make sushi again, I’ll be sure to take some nice beautiful shots of my Acapulco roll. However, I think the verdict may just be that sushi is one of those things best left to the pros. I saved a little money making it myself, but three hours is a long time for something that gets devoured in a few short minutes! If you’re thinking about making it yourself, though, I highly recommend the flavor combination of the Acapulco roll. Cilantro+sushi=yum.
I’ve been making a version of this deconstructed sushi salad for years. It’s easy and satisfies my craving for sushi without having to fuss with rolling it up. It’s also a lot cheaper than an order of carryout sushi! This time around, I made it with brown rice to go with the “heart-healthy” theme we chose this month on the Michigan Lady Food Bloggers blog (and discovered I liked it better than with white rice). The salad also contains avocados and yellowfin tuna, all foods that are recognized for their heart-healthy benefits. (I feel a bit sheepish; as I write this, my blog masthead is of a bunch of raw, fatty beef, about the most un-heart-healthy food out there!) I will tempt you (hopefully) with a few photos, but please hop over here to the MLFB blog for the full post with recipe. (And for another hearth-healthy brown rice salad recipe, check out this post.)